Sunday, November 23, 2014

Healing shame

Trying to contain our shame story rather than heal it only keeps us stuck in it. What is the shame story? That we have to be perfect. That we can't be wrong or make mistakes. That we're not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough...

So we secretly work hard to hide our flaws because we're afraid to be who we are. 

What causes shame? Growing up with negative messages that made us feel inadequate. Unresolved abuse issues that not only shredded our spirit, but left an imprint of feeling defective. Emotional abandonment which is another form of abuse. There are many factors that cause shame. All which can be debilitating! 

There is escape from shame except to face and heal it. The price of denial is suffering.

How do you heal it? We tenderly expose the shame by sharing it with someone safe. This life changing exercise begins to magically open the door not only to living more open-heartedly, but also gifting us with a beautiful sense of freedom we've never had before.


Saturday, November 22, 2014

Freedom from the past

When you let go of all the illusions...
 you've been clinging to for safety, 
all the sorrow you've carried for so long,
will have the freedom to express itself.


"All your past is gone except for the beauty of it"
- A Course in Miracles


Friday, November 21, 2014

Leaning into life

Imagine how much easier life would be if we didn't judge or label everything.
Whether you're aware of it or not, your mind is busy determining what's
right or wrong, what's good or bad. .

Can you trust that everything is just as it's suppose to be? Remember that our
minds are very limited so when things don't look as we think they should,
we meet them with fear and resistance. You will find more peace when you can
lean into the experience, accepting what is, trusting the wisdom of life.


Thursday, November 20, 2014

Resting on shaky ground

Isn't it nice when we're feeling low and then something comes along that inspires us? For that moment we feel lifted and excited with new ideas. In a way this can be helpful, but the flip side is that whatever feeling we previously had that was uncomfortable, was our opportunity to relax into the discomfort rather than move away from it. It can be challenging to see goodness when our lives feel mundane. But the high we get from being lifted up is only temporary. Over and over we find ourselves in the position of seeking the next thing to make us feel okay which causes a constant subtle (or not-so subtle) current of anxiety. We've accept it as normal, but it's not.
So what's the solution? Sitting uncomfortably in the ordinariness until it feels like home. We can end our search for something that doesn't exist and relax into the sacredness of what is. Rather than strive for a life that requires us to seek fulfillment, we are fulfilled by the truth of what life is about...uncertainty, change, many uncomfortable moments...

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Open to life

I love the peony flower. When I spotted 3 pink ones the other day at the store, I was excited over my find. They hadn't begun to blossom yet so I knew there was a risk they wouldn't open up. So far only 2 show promise.

I'm reminded how life extends us the opportunity to blossom. The experiences that bring us to our knees, that break through our denial and crumble our protective shields, are the ones that teach each us about love and compassion.

When life brings us those opportunities, we either choose to blossom or remain tight in the bud. We become bitter or we soften with compassion.


Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Letting things fall apart


There are times when we have no choice but to let things fall apart...
times when we have no control over our circumstances...
times that we grope to find some solid ground when there is none...
times when things are unraveling, changing,
and the uncertaintity feels unbearable.

The thing that starts to undo us may be illness, death, divorce,
financial troubles, the loss of a job... 

In life there is a duality whether we like it or not.
Good days, sad days, frustrating days.
Life won't be wonderful all the time.
Nothing is going to stay the same.
We will all experience pain.

As much as we may feel flattened by our circumstances,
we need to be present to the experience,
letting our hearts feel it's entirety, finding compassion...

Trying to avoid pain causes us to be more afraid
which hardens our hearts and creates a feeling of isolation.

Falling apart can be the catalyst to open us up...
to have a deeper connection with all things.

 We can't shield ourselves from the frailty of life,
but we can build a more tender relationship with it.
We can let our pain transform us,
softening our edges, expanding our hearts,
gifting us with more compassion for ourselves and others.


Saturday, November 15, 2014

Resting in the emptiness

In giving up magical thinking (wanting things to be different than they are), we can have a joyful relationship with life. We're not always going to get what we want. Things are not always going to go in our favor. We're all going to face times that challenge us. In accepting that this is a natural part of life, it will be easier to let go of control.

It's time to give up the search for security, the search for certainty, the search for firmer ground. Let things change, let things die away, let go of attachments, release old crappy beliefs, feel your fear rather than looking for an escape from it. Learn to let all things be.